I think as women sometimes our own insecurities destroy our filter. We say way to often the first thing our insecurities bring to our minds. Most the time it's the thing we think will help us feel better about ourselves, all the while making others feel bad about themselves. My friend Jeanne told me a great quote she heard from a wise man (Bob Eubanks). He said, don't blow someone else's candle out in order to make yours shine brighter. I thought about that for a minute, and then said even better blow your own candle out so they can shine alone.
As women we can be so jealous and just insensitive. I knew a woman once that really could barely put food on her table, but she had a talent for stretching a dollar. Most of her shopping was done at the sav-a -lot grocery store. In one conversation with a few girls they asked her in almost admiration, how do you do it. So feeling proud of her talent she told them. One responded "oh I could never shop there, that store is dirty". The woman's pride quickly turned to shame. I wonder if that is what the other woman wanted. I would take a guess into her life I bet she likes the best of the best, kind of that "keeping up with the Jones's' thing. I bet her husband fusses about her spending. I think the woman's thriftiness made her jealous, and with jealously rises up a need to boost our own self worth.
We need to be really careful of the words we let out of our mouths, we need to be really careful that the habit of insensitivity does not become our character. Often the first thought that comes to mind is that flesh response that we should lock away.
Take advise from the grandparents "if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing". And from the bible
EPH 4: 29 Let no foul or polluting language, nor evil word nor unwholesome or worthless talk [ever] come out of your mouth, but only such [speech] as is good and beneficial to the spiritual progress of others, as is fitting to the need and the occasion, that it may be a blessing and give grace (God's favor) to those who hear it.
And let it start with me!